Wednesday, November 26, 2008

ew of the Vagina Monologues/Barbados

ew of the Vagina Monologues/Barbados

 by: Marsha Caddle

The Frank Collymore Hall was pulsing, vibrating, raving, crying, retaliating, and gushing self-affirmation when the Vagina Monologues came to the stage last Sunday evening, in a celebration of V-day hosted by the National Organization of Women (NOW). The Vagina Monologues is not only a revolutionary, provoking and eye-opening evening of entertainment, it is a bold step towards increasing awareness about violence against women and girls, and securing financial resources for organizations working towards stopping such violence and helping its survivors. V-Day was born in 1998 out of the Monologues, as its creator and performer Eve Ensler heard in her travels hundreds of womens stories of rape, incest, domestic battery and genital mutilation. She joined with a group of women to found V-day, a global movement to end violence against women. The V in V-Day represents Valentine, Violence, and of course, Vagina; and this word resounded proudly throughout the auditorium as Varia Williams, Kaye Foster, Amanda Cumberbatch and Cecily Spencer-Cross stepped soundlessly into the lives of different women from across the globe, to share the latters experiences, or lack thereof, with their vaginas.

At the opening of the show, the cast burst excitedly into the theatre, clapping in time and adding their own voices to a pre-recorded background chant of the title of the presentation. While the song itself lacked melody and unity with the subject, and suspiciously resembled a hastily-composed signature piece, it served to engage the audience and unabashedly introduce the theme of the show: vaginas. From their entry by the main hall doors and through the audience, the scene onstage into which the women of the cast moved helped, with its living room-type furnishings, to create an atmosphere of camaraderie among them, which was conveyed onto the monologues they interpreted, and so represented fellowship among women across the world. The creation of this sense of fellowship was supported by the encouraging words and looks exchanged among the women as they moved from one monologue to the other. It solidified a dual message: that womens sexual expression and awareness is to be celebrated amongst ourselves, but also that violence against women is a crisis which we all share as women, and as a society. It undermines womanhood, not only the women who experience it directly, and it undermines civilization.

There was no elaborate scenic or sound design, lighting or costuming. The nakedness of all these elements was key in supporting the theme of the vagina: that which is only directly visible through nakedness, but whose existence moves along a social spectrum from being forgotten, to innately felt, to overtly degraded. A subtly brilliant touch to the costume was a scarf - worn by each cast member which also served as a prop. It was alternately draped at the shoulder, tied about the head, or worn as a burka, as an uncomplicated mode of transition for the cast members into the different female subjects of the monologues. Manipulation of the scarf by the cast was completely unobtrusive, and contributed to providing some action on a set which would otherwise have been too static at times.

This ability of the cast to abandon self and remain inconspicuous when necessary was transferred to their performance reading of the monologues. They were each able to slip quietly into the roles required to interpret each piece: the intelligent, introspective and refreshingly witty British participant in a vagina workshop whose catharsis came when she was challenged to be [her clitoris; the self-effacing older woman whose sad detachment from her own vagina was the lasting result of an embarrassing first sexual encounter left undiscussed and unexplained; the young, at first, innocent Southern American girl whose illegal seduction by an older woman was sadly, some might say her only opportunity to love her coochi snorcher, and therefore herself.

The actors were wonderfully convincing in their roles, and their voice, accent and movement greatly strengthened the believability of the monologues being related. Amanda Cumberbatch was bright, funny, sexy and intelligent in her readings. Kaye Foster at times stopped just short of overplaying certain parts, but was endearing, amusing and greatly credible in her performances. Cecily Spencer-Cross assumed the role of narrator for much of the presentation, and in her one longer piece seemed not to shine as much as her fellow cast members. Some elements of her voice and movement were mildly distracting, although the compelling story was able to stand on its own, and convey to the audience the desolation and desperation which are left in the wake of grossly violent acts against women. First Vice President of NOW Senator Jessica Odle and well-known lawyer/thespian Andrew Pilgrim also gave creditable performances as guest readers, with Pilgrims vivid account of the rape and genital mutilation of a woman by her boyfriend evoking gasps and tears from the audience. Attaching a mans voice to this piece was a wise directorial choice, and enhanced the sobering and bewildering effect of the account.

The audience favourite for the evening, however, was Varia Williams interpretation of The Woman Who Loved To Make Vaginas Happy. Williams stepped into the exciting skin of a brash, intelligent, humorous and unapologetic Southern tax lawyer turned sex worker, whose greatest reward in sexually pleasuring women was experiencing their moans. Her monologue climaxed with a demonstration of these various moans, including the Trini moan and the Bajan moan, whose verisimilitude was summarily refreshing and entertaining, and earned her a standing ovation. In coming to each monologue Williams gave the audience a palpable sense of abandonment of self, and created among us an air of expectancy. Hers was a sound and outstanding contribution to an overall brilliant performance by the cast.

The presentation was directed by Thom Cross, part of the team of Cross Caribbean Productions, whose conceptualization stayed true to the writers intentions. The script was well-interpreted, and a good use of space kept the stage comfortably balanced, particularly during the choral segments. Cross maintained unity in communication of the concepts being explored, while not compromising the theme of variety and diversity of experience which was a key part of the message. It was indeed a strong Caribbean interpretation and production of a not-so-brilliantly scripted North American creation.

About The Author

Marsha Caddle is an economist working in the area of women's economic security and rights. She has an avid interest in the theatre, and is a frequent critic of Caribbean literary and theatrical productions; especially those based on women.


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Sunday, November 2, 2008

Women Self-Pleasure - 8 Tips To Increase You Pleasure and Satisfaction

Self-pleasure is good for you and is considered to have actual health benefits. Self-pleasure is great as well girls; you get to do it by yourself, on your own terms, you can also experiment to find out what you like and what turns you on. Unfortunately growing up many women are raised with little information about our genitals, sex and self-pleasuring does not really come naturally for everyone. The secret to bringing each woman to orgasm is different. Women can climax through clitoral stimulation, vaginal penetration or G-Spot stimulation. There is no wrong way self-pleasure we are all different. Here in this article we will just try and point you in the right direction ladies.1. Setting the moodIf you are going to get the most from the experience you must give yourself plenty of time. I would advise that you give yourself at least half an hour. Get yourself in a relaxed mood; take a bath or pour yourself a generous glass of wine. It is as much about state of mind as it is about technique ladies. Next make sure that you can’t be disturbed. That means turning off the mobile/cell, locking the door and if you have children send them round a neighbours. Then get yourself in a position you feel comfortable and relaxed in. Women generally start out on their backs, legs bent and spread apart, with their feet on the ground. Make sure that you have plenty of support and cushioning.2. Fantasize/romanticize for self-pleasureThis is your alone time and recalling a past sexual encounter or elaborate on a favourite sexual fantasy can really set the mood. If you need a little of bit of help getting started then read an erotic story, look at a sexy publication or even indulge in a bit of adult entertainment. Ladies this is you time anything goes as long as it get the pulse racing.3. Explore all parts of your bodyIt amazing but a lot of women really don’t know their own bodies at all. Experiment and run your hands all over your body and if some thing feels good then linger there and just enjoy the feeling it creates. Look at your genitals in a mirror (especially if you are unfamiliar with it) and caress the different parts to see what feels good to you. There are the inner and outer labia, your clitoris, your vagina and your perineum.

4. Don’t be afraid to play around to find what is best for youLadies get those fingers working; use one or two fingers and start to stoke different parts of you vulva and remembering to stimulate your clitoris and labia. Find the rhythm that works for you this means experimenting with pressure, speed and motion. I suggest placing fingers either side of the clitoris and stoking up and down, or placing two fingers on the clitoral hood and rubbing in a circular motion.5. Life is about surprisesUnless you are willing to open up your mind girls and let yourself be comfortable with your own skin and trying everything you will not get the most from your own body. When self-pleasuring try different types of touch: stroke, tickle, knead or why not even try gently pulling your genitals. Anything goes ladies. Use one or several fingers, the palm of the hand even your knuckles. Don’t be afraid it will only take you to a better place.6. It is a long and winding roadThe thought of reaching that climax is all part of the fun. The thought of riding the wave will build the anticipation. You can add to that by enhancing the excitement yourselves girls. Learn to hold on to your sexual excitement by building up and then reducing temporarily the stimulus. Listen to what your body is telling you. Your own body will tell you when you have the right tempo or when a certain tickle feels good.7. Remain relaxedAs the sexual energy starts to build it is critical to let it take you and not to fight it. Breathing deeply rather than holding your breath will help as will rocking your pelvis as in intercourse will help. I would also suggest rhythmically clenching and releasing your PC muscle (if you are looking for vaginal penetration then a dildo will help).8. Ride the wave When the climax starts please continue to stimulate through the orgasm. The body start to get more sensitive so lighten up during those first receptive seconds but keep going to enjoy the pleasurable aftershocks. The first orgasm may feel like a blip or a explosion however the more you practice the more range you will develop and understand.Self-pleasuring is obviously a very personnel thing. It is though something to be embraced and practice will only lead to a better orgasm as you find what works for you. Experimentation through self-pleasure will not only lead to personnel self satisfaction but can only benefit your sex life as you work out what you like and then pass on that information to your partner. By Holly Franklin

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Saturday, November 1, 2008

Self-Pleasure Tips for Women ~ Using Your Hands and Fingers

Our hands and fingertips contain a lot of nerve-endings rendering them very handy (pun intended) for self-pleasure purposes. Therefore, it makes sense to include the use of our hands and fingers as one of the most effective self-pleasure tips for women.A self-pleasure tip for women using your hands and fingers involves running your hands all over your body. Feel the smoothness and silkiness of your own skin. You may scrape your nails lightly over several places. Massage and caress yourself all over and be aware of how the said parts of your body, as well as your hands and fingers, feel as you do so.Next self-pleasure tip for women: Venture into your own erogenous zones. Run your fingertips over your neck, your inner thighs, your inner arms, your palms, and finally, your breasts and that triangle between your thighs. Caress your breasts. You may want to do all these while looking at yourself in the mirror. Massage your breasts in a circular motion with the flat side of your palms. Feel the tingling sensation in your palms as you do so. Much like the striptease acts that you see in erotic movies, pull on your nipples and twirl them between your fingers. Notice how at certain points of this motion, there seem to be a single thread connecting the middle of your palms, the middle of your feet, your nipples and your clitoris. This will produce a-wetness between your thighs.

Finally, the final act in your regimen of self-pleasure tips for women: Touch yourself. Discover where your clitoris is. As you well know, your clitoris is the seat of all sexual pleasure. Rub your fingers and the flat of your palms in your most sensitive places. Massage your clitoris. Wet your fingers with your mouth and put your fingers inside you one by one that is, as many of them as you can take in at once. Then, go nuts! By E.J. Davis

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